RhodyRaybo's blog

Ok, this week marks my 4th anniversary of wrestling. As of today, I have had 488 matches with 96 different guys. At least half were one-shot deals, but a handful became semi-regulars at some point, even if for a little while. So I figured I would share my insights on how to spot a potential semi regular wrestling bro apart from a guy you might only wrestle once or maybe just once a year.

First, my situation, I'm happily married to a wonderful woman who lets me wrestle in our basement. Also, I don't do sex, though grabbing doesn't bother me. For me that's all guy play. With that said, I will share the following signs that make the best potential semi regular wrestling bro.

PASSION! First, he has to have passion. He must love wrestling for wrestling sake. If he's just looking at the wrestling as foreplay, a serious wrestler like myself will always be disappointed, and it's unlikely you'll see each other again. Do as much chatting with him before you meet him. If the conversation quickly goes to "what happens if I get hard?"....don't waste your time. He doesn't really want to wrestle.

HONESTY WITH THEIR SIGNIFICANT-OTHERS! Whatever type of relationship they are in, if they can be honest with the person they are in a relationship with about their desire to wrestle, and you both click, then it is likely you will wrestle at least a few times. Three of my all time favorite wrestling bros were honest, at least to some degree, with their wives about wrestling. "Stanley" says his wife knows he needs his "guy time" and that she knows he's going to spar. "Kevin" cleared it with his wife at the beginning and hosts matches in his awesome man-cave. "Jim-Bob" was up front with his wife and turned out to be my all time favorite.... sadly though, he and I have had a difference of opinion on something that happened, and we are currently not wrestling, though I'm optimistic that we will be able to come to a future agreement and be back on the mats again someday. But these guys, when they have their freedom without any guilt about what they are doing always make the best wrestlers. They are full of energy and I have always had the best times with them.

SINGLE GUYS....what can I say? I LOVE guys who are completely unattached. No worries, no sense of sneaking around. Some of them can even host! This doesn't mean they will all be semi regulars. I had one guy who lives nearby wrestle me a few times, but he admits, he doesn't want to do it on a regular basis. Once in a while is what he wants. That's fine with me. One of my favorites is a divorced dad who has his child twice a week. The nights he has the kid are out of the question, but when he's alone, the only thing preventing us from wrestling is our schedules, which lately have been conflicting.

GUYS WHO LIKE TO FANTASIZE AND TRASH TALK! This is a clear sign that he's serious. Guys who are animated always thirst for more. Flexing, stakes (within parameters for me), trash talk, wanting to watch videos while wrestling, are all signs of a guy who really gets into it.

OUT OF TOWN TRAVELERS! I LOVE these guys. Right now I have a few guys that look me up when they are in the area. There's "Pat" from Philly who has family in the area, he's contacted me when he's visiting them. Our last match was absolutely astounding! We were animals with each other! There's also "Jonah" from the DC area who travels around the world. He contacts me when he's in the Boston area and we go at it. I sure hope I didn't hurt my chances with him last time. Last time he was in the area I was stressed out from the home renovations going on and a busy schedule. Hopefully my lackluster performance won't end our friendship. And there's also "Desi". I LOVE this guy. He lives about 4 to 5 hours away, but we've had some astounding matches when we meet. I even made a special trip at a halfway point recently and we split a room for the night. What a great night it was! Oh and by the way, both "Jonah" and "Desi" are both big time into trash talking and being silly while wrestling. I also wrestled another out-of-towner last week, twice. I think it will not be our last time! woo hoo!

CONVENIENCE. Yes, convenience is a factor. I have one semi regular who works about 20 minutes away and is able to come to my house right after work before he heads back home to MA to take care of business at home.

With all that said, what are some factors to be aware of that are signs that the guy you just wrestled may not be able to do it too frequently? Glad you asked. Here are the main ones....

WORK SCHEDULE: Guys who have their own business, have a demanding work schedule, or work more than one job, don't expect to see them too often. Because even when they have time to wrestle, chances are they will have other things to do or just plain be too tired. Try to accommodate them when they request a match, because chances are you might not have another opportunity any time soon.

DISTANCE: a no-brainer. Driving 90 minutes to 2 hours can seem worth the excitement at the beginning, but once you know the guy, the drive can get old quickly. guys who are a distance, just plan on spacing them out.

SPOUSES OR PARNTERS WHO DON'T KNOW: These guys can be great wrestlers but quite frustrating at the same time. These guys can be very hard to get to commit, and for good reason. They have to think up an excuse almost each time they come to see you. They also have an extremely high cancellation rate. My experience is that unless they are out of towners actually wrestling them will not be regular. Guarantee it.

LARGE EXTENDED FAMILY NEARBY: It doesn't matter what their orientation is. If they are caretakers for elderly parents or have a lot of siblings and nieces and nephews nearby, their free time is limited. The extended family usually has a lot going on when they live close together and they usually depend on the potential wrestler for moral support and help with children or parents...AND RIGHTLY SO. There are such things as priorities in life. Just because my family is scattered and my sons are grown, doesn't mean other guys shouldn't embrace their families. These honorable guys make great sons, brothers, uncles, etc...but usually don't make regular wrestling buddies. When you wrestle such a guy, make the most of that match. Enjoy his company and chat with him through texting or whatever means you prefer, but don't expect to see him again for a while. He's just being a good family member.

RAG DOLL SYNDROME: Have wrestled many guys who just lay limp and don't fight back. These guys usually have to improve just to be "jobbers". Not sure why some of these guys even wrestle but when they don't offer any resistance and seem to be staring into space, face it, this isn't something you want to be doing regularly anyway.

Ok these are my thoughts for the day on this subject. I hope that this will be of some help to anyone reading. If you have any additional thoughts on the subject, feel free to message me and maybe I'll include them in this blog or do a "Part 2".