RhodyRaybo's blog

A short time ago got a new guy to my basement to wrestle. He was new to wrestling, though in decent shape. He was only 26, and here I am pushing 50. We wrestled, roughhoused and I demonstrated my best moves on him. He seemed to enjoy it. He laughed when I held him tight. I started saying "come to papa bear" as I held him close. He laughed the whole time enjoying every minute of it. However, this young professional man had one annoying trait to him. One thing he kept doing and it was getting old quickly. He kept wedgies! I've wrested 55 different guys in the last 2 years in over 200 matches. This was definitely a first. And to be honest, I HATE wedgies! So after the 3rd time or so, I finally had enough and pulled his briefs off completely, held him down then slipped mine off. I said to him "If you insist on pulling a wedgies, we're wrestling naked!" And we did. And not to my surprise, he didn't mind. Though we did nothing in the nature of any sex acts, I don't go for those. But we continued as we were doing, just with nothing on.

So new rule, from now on, if you give me a wedgie, I'm removing all gear. And by the way, gear will be returned upon completion of the match.

I've been wrestling since July 2011. I am very persistent in finding matches and new opponents. Some would even say that I've become an addict. So be it. But I will say, that since I began 2 years ago, I have had 208 matches with 55 different opponents. I've gone against total beginners to more skilled pro types. And I can truthfully say that I have made some of the best buddies you could possibly ask for. How could I have so many matches? Some in that count are group matches, I count each guy I wrestle at such a gathering as a separate match. But with a one on one, the match must go more than 10 minutes. I had a couple that lasted less than 5 minutes. I don't count those. Trying to expand now to some light boxing and gut punching. I hope to get back into writing regular blogs about my matches. See you on the mats!

After 75 matches with 29 different guys in a 12 month period, I decided to sit back and reflect on my top 5 favorite wrestling buddies. It was easy to pick them out. About half the guys I wrestled were one shot deals. Some of those were not a heartbreak to me. Others, it would have been nice to see them more than once. But for the guys who stand out I'm giving mention to each of them in a "Best Of..." approach. And I will use all made-up names to protect their privacy. So here goes.

BEST BROMANCE "Todd" age-mid 50's, lives 20 minutes away, single, straight, about my size, cannot host. Todd was the second guy I wrestled with when I started last July. His knowledge of wrestling moves is limited, but he can hold his own. He was the first to put me in a scissors lock. He was also the first to treat me as a genuine friend. After our match, we didn't see each other for a few weeks, but much to my surprise, I continued hearing from him through email. He was very encouraging. We started meeting semi regularly and wound up wrestling 10 times. During our matches, we talked an awful lot and enjoyed each other's company. He was the first wrestler that I confided in with a lot of personal issues. We became close friends. Unfortunately, he's had some health issues this past year, so any future matches are on hold for now. But he is having them addressed, so we'll be able to get back into the swing sometime next winter hopefully. In the meantime, we continue to communicate and keep each other updated on what's happening with us. So "Todd" gets the "Best Bromance" award.

BEST SUB WRESTLER "Stanley" Mid-50's, mostly straight, married, family man, smaller, muscular, fairly hairy, cannot host. I met Stanley at a garage of another wrestler last August. The host had Stanley and myself wrestle right after I arrived. It only lasted about 10 minutes, but I knew at that point that I wanted to go at it with this guy again. He left shortly after and I had a session with the host. That guy who hosted and I have not been in touch lately, but Stanley and I began wrestling semi regularly the following January. While Stanley does not employ a large variety of moves when we wrestle, he has tremendous strength, energy, and speed. He likes sub wrestling and it's always a battle to to see who can pin or nail whom. When he has me on my back he often treats me to his grinding his hairy chest in my face. Love it!! Then after a tapout (usually me), we embrace for several minutes. But what I love about Stanley is that he's been wrestling for many years and has quite a list of semi regulars, largely guys who travel to the major city he lives near. So with all that demand and heavy activity, I consider it such a high honor and privilege to be on his list of regulars. He also is one to try to push me to the next level. He wants me to get better at what I do, and with his brotherly help, it's happening. Thank you so much Stanley.

BEST BEAR MATCH "Wilfred" mid-30's, gay, single, slightly bigger than I am, very, very hairy, cannot host. Lives 25 minutes north of me. What do I mean by "Bear Match"? Picture 2 very hairy guys going at it who mutually admire each others' very hairy chests. That is a "bear match". Thus enters "Wilfred". He and I first met and wrestled sometime during the winter when I had a 3 day trial "premium membership" on another site. I sent out over 30 invites to wrestle, and "Wilfred" was the only one who met with me, or even agreed to for that matter. We have now wrestled 7 times and will continue to do so as circumstances allow. Wilfred is very strong, but not unbeatable. I am able to get him to tap out at least once each session. After each tap out we might massage each others pecs or bellies, hug a bit, or just plain talk. He's actually quite funny when he tells of his antics with his parents, work, or roommate. He actually might do well as a stand up comic. But either way, I always look forward to meeting with "Wilfred". It's always intense, fun, and humorous.

BEST JOBBER "Ron", mid 40's, straight?, divorced father of one, 50 lbs lighter than me, works 20 minutes north of me, lives about 45 minutes east of me. I don't see this fav anywhere near as often as I wish I could. Our schedules and infirmities just seem to prevent us from grappling as often as we'd like. But nonetheless, this jobber whom I first met in March and grappled with 4 times so far is very deserving of a place on my list of fav's. Despite the fact that he is trained in various martial arts and is quite strong, his first choice is to be a jobber. But he's no rag doll here. He will make you work for the title of heel. He loves being in a hold and trying to get out of it. I always say I love the looks on his face. He also loves belly and pec play, and will trade rolls and play the heel if you ask him to. Bottom line, I have had so much fun being heel to him, and he's very down to earth and personable. On our first match, I felt as though I was wrestling an old friend rather than a guy I just met. So 5 dings for "Ron". He's tops in my list of wrestling buddies even though I usually look "down" on him while grappling.

BEST ALL AROUND "Jim-Bob" early 30's, about 65 lbs heavier than me, straight, family man, hairy chest and belly, lives about an hour away, cannot host. I had every intention of including this very special wrestler in my list of favorites, but what title to give him? I couldn't think of one thing in particular, but rather, several things. So I decided to award him "Best All Around". We met back in May for the first time though we had chatted months earlier, but a match didn't happen back then. But when we planned our initial meeting back in May, we chatted quite extensively beforehand, both on line and on the phone. And the more we chatted, the more we realized the common interests we had when wrestling. We both love hugging and long embraces. We both love hanging together. We both love making videos of our meets then watching them together. We both love certain types of wrestling that I won't go into. And he has gotten me interested in more gut punching, something he loves. Our matches are long...at least 3 hours. We meet, we embrace, we wrestle, we embrace, we wrestle, we embrace, we through some talking in there and we just have an all around great time. Let's just say, we really clicked. We've had 3 matches so far with a fourth one in the planning stages. I honestly didn't think that I would click so strongly with someone that much younger than myself, but I have. We've become very close friends in the process and Instant Message each other very regularly. So hats off to "Jim-Bob" for making every aspect of our wrestling relationship the best one could ever ask for.

Again, the men here are real, the names have been changed and locations concealed to protect their privacy. If any of them read this and wish to identify themselves, they are free to do so. But hopefully they'll all read this and realize they did more than just wrestle. They bonded. And I love them all like brothers, well more than brothers because I never really got along with my biological brothers to begin with. Peace out!

I have been active in wrestling since July 5th, 2011 when I had my first match. As of today, July 18th 2012, I have had my 75th match as of last night. I am in chat rooms of another site and message guys on other sites quite frequently. When I tell them of my activity, the question I get asked the most is "how do you do it?". I answer that I'm a "persistent bugger". But in the last 13 months and all the matches I've had with 29 different opponents, I've learned a few things. So if you'd like matches that are more in quantity AND quality, then follow a few guidelines that I've learned.

First, if you can find a way to host, do it! There are so many guys who want to wrestle, but genuinely cannot host. But, if you can provide a discreet, safe environment where your guest's privacy will be assured, I guarantee, you'll not only have matches, but semi-regulars like I do. If you live alone, then you should be able to do this unless you live in a large complex with paper-thin walls. For those of you who don't live alone, maybe it's time to talk to the wife, roommate, parent, girlfriend, or whoever that you are into wrestling. There are gradual ways to build up to the subject with the other person. Me, however, I just blurted it right out. I figured my wife would understand that I would not do anything outside of established boundaries, and she did. Her concern was me getting injured. I have a finished basement that I wrestle in. There is a door in the back of the house that goes directly into the basement. My opponents enter and go directly down there with nobody from the family ever seeing them enter or leave. It is well understood with my family that when Dad is down there wrestling, keep out unless there is a dire emergency. I tell them if they need to communicate, call the cell phone which I always have nearby while wrestling. Out of 23 guys who have come to the house, only 2 have met my wife and that was only because they wanted to. Also, my wife never watches. She has no interest. So hosting is key to having frequent matches.

Second, while communicating with prospective opponents, always be as detailed as possible about wrestling. What style you do, your willingness to adapt to his style, what gear is worn (if any), will water be provided, and boundaries. Be up front on how you handle "boning up". It's very embarrassing to your guest if he makes an assumption and you have to yell "Stop!" when he makes a move that he thought would be acceptable to you. Also be up front about what holds you like and whether you're into hugging and cuddling. I've wrestled several gay men who were very respectful of my boundaries and a few married men who were not. Communication is essential to mutual fun. And, boundaries are not just limited to physical contact, there are emotional boundaries as well. I've made close friends with several of my opponents, but there are those who are interested only in the wrestling itself. They could care less about you personally. Be prepared for this. Some you will click with, others, not so much.

Another way to get matches is to be persistent. Grab every opportunity and outlet to make contacts. I keep an ad on Craig's List and utilize the wrestling social sites. Most of them are free, but some have a "premium" membership that requires payment. Usually the free option works if you don't mind spending time in the chat rooms. I was on one site that required payment for any membership and it was full of videos, stories, pictures, and forums, but very little, if any actual contact. I didn't renew my membership when it expired. Persistence will also mean being flexible. Do you want to wrestle someone, but he wants you to job? Do it. If something is within your boundaries, but maybe not your first inclination, make an adjustment. You might just like it. Also, remember to follow up. After a match, send a message thanking him for coming and telling him that you had a good time. Keep in touch. Chat with them in the "rooms". Send an occasional, "hi there". That is key to getting guys you enjoyed wrestling back. And also, if a prospective opponent only wants to communicate with you but can't meet right away, then by all means, communicate with him. I have 2 buddies that I have never met but hope to someday that I "instant message" with constantly. I am hoping that we will wrestle one day. But that won't happen if I don't exercise some patience and friendship.

Next, be aware of red flags. If a wrestling buddy warns you about someone that you've made contact with, take the warning seriously. Also, when one immediately starts talking about sexual encounters or send explicit photos when all you want to do is wrestle, just say right away..."sorry, not into that". If they're willing to forgo that, then there's a chance of an actual match. But in most cases, you won't hear back from them. Also, when the initial match is cancelled by the other person and they express no desire to reschedule, then move on. It ain't gonna happen. Out of all the initial matches that were canceled on me, (literally dozens) only one was rescheduled some time later.

And finally, I have discovered that one should never be discouraged by setbacks. If you really love something, in this case wrestling, setbacks will happen. But your love for the activity will motivate you to keep plugging away. It's a lot like life, actually. Had a no-show? Keep plugging. A match got too rough and you got injured? Happened to me. Take some time off for healing then get back into it, but LEARN from the experience. I now request my opponents to refrain from pouncing on me because that's how I got 2 out my 3 injuries. Match too brief? Match got "hotter" than you wanted? Did a "cum" when you tried not to? Opponent was a jerk? These are disappointing, but don't let the disappointments discourage you. I've learned there are so many decent guys who love grappling who will do what they can to meet you halfway. But be discerning too. Don't compromise what's most important to you. Learn what are the "must-haves" in an opponent and what is negotiable. I for one love to spend time hugging my wrestling buddies. But if someone who wants to grapple doesn't go for that, then it's not on the agenda.

Well, that's about all I wanted to say. 75 matches in a little over a year's time? I in no way imagined I would be doing that much when I started. And they haven't all been the same. I've jobbed, heeled, done sub, exchanged holds, and some matches were more talking than wrestling. Some matches exceeded my expectations. Some were duds. In this activity one needs to take the bad with the good. But keep plugging. Hang on the sites, and do what you can to make the match not only happen but to be one you'll look back on fondly for months to come.

I have been wrestling for over a year. I became addicted to the sport immediately after my first match. Seeing that I can host in my basement with my family's full knowledge, I have had 74 matches with about three quarters of them here in my basement. Not once has the family ever interrupted any of my matches.

But when my matches meet me at my house I very often stand in front of the house and wait. I'll request they text when they get off the highway, for I am just 3 minutes from the exit, and I stand outside or look out the window in eager anticipation. Then it happens, I see a car. If I don't know what they're driving, then I'm wondering...if there's more than one person in the car, it's not him. If it's a woman driving, it's not him. obviously. But then it happens, I see the car. It's him! Either he's been here before, or I just recognize him by his photo or description. The heart is racing, the adrenalin is already pumping.

He pulls up by the house. I'm smiling and waiting for him to get out of the car and get his gear. I can't wait much longer, but try to hide my excitement. We go inside. It's time. We go inside down to the basement. Then the fun begins. Why do I stand outside and wait? Maybe it's the thrill of the anticipation. I don't really know. But once they drive up, I know 80 percent of the battle is done...scheduling the match. Ding, ding, ding. Let the games begin!